March 15, 2016
Isaiah 41:10 Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
Pastor Joyce gave me this verse one night at the Brecksville Church of God of Prophecy when I was going through a very rough time in my life. I memorized it and have remembered it many times over the years. It is my “go to” verse in times of trouble. It has come to mind the last few days since my son passed away, and it says so much.
I have been able to make this far. I broke down into hysterics when it first happened, as I imagine any mother would do. There is nothing to compare to the heart wrenching pain you feel when you are told your child is gone. It doesn’t matter how they go, it is the empty hole that is left behind, the realization that you will not speak them again while you are on this earth, no more waiting for the weekly call, no more writing letters of advice and no more need to say all the prayers you did for them.
I prayed that Jesus takes good care of him, for I know in my heart that is where he is. I have repeated this verse many times out loud and in my head over the last several days. Life on this planet is never assured. Death shows up without a notice on many occasions as it did in this instant. I have prayed that he didn’t suffer, but that doesn’t matter either for he is gone. He is now in the arms of Jesus.
People gather strength during sad times from many sources. Some turn to alcohol, drugs, prescription meds or entirely try to block it out of their mind. Some search for answers that are never found.Some people who feel they have no way may suffer a breakdown. Others rely on the kind words of family and friends and there are those, like myself, who rely on God.
God doesn’t always explain why he does what he does, why he allows things to happen that break our hearts, in fact he rarely explains it to any of us. We can run ourselves ragged looking for the answers or we can leave it all in God’s hands and draw strength from the fact that he is always in control. Today I am thankful for the strength he has given me through this sad time.
March 16, 2016
1 Corinthians 13: 4-8 4.love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud 5. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs 6. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth. 7. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8. Love never fails but where there are prophecies, they will cease, where there are tongues, they will be stilled, where there is knowledge, it will pass away.
We all go through trying times. Life is one big huge roller coaster. One day everything is going along fine and then the whole world crashes at your feet. Maybe it is a death in the family, maybe the loss of a job, a divorce, a natural disaster or a crime. One day your life is full of sunshine and the next it is as dark as night.
We are not promised all that we want on this earth, but we are expected to use what we have been given. God gave us many gifts, not just in material form but in spirit also. The greatest of these is love and we are supposed to love everyone, even the ones that we think are not living right, even the ones who cause us pain and grief, and even those that are our greatest enemies.
I have watched so many times when family, friends and communities have come together to show their support and love for someone who is going through a bad time, and it amazes me how they all pull together. I am totally amazed at the amount of people who love me and care about me. I got a chance to see this when my son recently passed away. I never realized that there were that many people who cared about me. Today I am thankful for God’s love and for all the love I have experienced in the last few days.
1 Corinthians 13: 13 And now these three remain; faith, hope and love. The greatest of these is love.
March 17, 2016
Summer is coming, yeah!!!! I love the warmer weather, in fact I find something enjoyable and beautiful in every season it’s just that the colder weather limits my movements outdoors. I look forward to Spring and Summer because of the warmth, the animals and all the green and pretty colored plants. I love to watch the bushes and trees sprout their leaves, and I love to watch the flowers bloom. I love to watch the birds pecking out on the lawn and flying overhead, and the squirrels running up and down the trees.
Today I actually saw a little white butterfly out in the back yard, and that’s a good sign that the weather is going to get warmer. It’s a bit chilly out there but the sky is clear and the sun is shining. I need a good serotonin uptake, ha!!!!
Today I am thankful for Spring and Summer, for the rebirth of life that has laid dormant for most of the cold winter months. To me these seasons are a sign from God that he hasn’t forgotten us, he hasn’t abandoned us.
Genesis 8:22 While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.