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Sleep, Soul Searching, The Will to Go On, and Reading the Word

starry skiesOctober 19, 2016 – Sleep

When I was young, it seemed as if I could go forever without sleeping. When I was in my late teens to early twenties, it wasn’t odd for me to end up staying awake for over 24 hours once in awhile. It seems that lack of sleep followed me, for as I went through life there always seemed to be something that would rob me of a few hours of sleep. If you don’t sleep it eventually catches up with you.

Sometimes I worked two jobs, which by the time I got home, ate, and went to bed, it was but a few hours before I had to get up and go back to work. Other times, when I lived with other families, it seemed that I would end up being responsible for getting their children up and off to school because I also had to wake my son. The sad part of that was that the younger children would also wake up and the parents just assumed I would watch them. Robbed again of many hours of sleep.

At my last job, before I went on the road for the company, I was doing their international calls from home because of the difference in time zones. I would wake up every two hours to call different countries, which fit in any way as I had to get up every few hours to check on Ken to make sure he hadn’t gone into congestive heart failure again.

It seems that even though I am disabled, there are times when there is so much that needs to be done, that I can’t seem to get to bed before midnight on most nights. Doctors visits, ER visits, checking in on Rich’s mom, last minute runs to the store, migraine headaches etc. seem to eat up so many hours of the day. The upside to this? I can take a nap every day, so I still get enough sleep to function most of the time. Today I am thankful for the slower days when I can get enough sleep.

sunrise

October 20,2016 – Soul Searching

Every so often I do what I call soul searching. I think back over the last few days, the last few weeks, sometimes a month ago and try to call up anything that I might have said or done wrong. Then I analyze, looking at the circumstances at the time and what caused me to think, talk or act the way I did.

Often I find that I could have handled things differently if I had just taken the time to think about what was going on at the time before I acted or spoke. I learn a lot of lessons, life lessons, God lessons when I do this, and I, of course immediately repent of my words or actions.

Life isn’t easy. It was never meant to be. God did not promise we would have an easy life on this earth. He promised rewards to the Israelite’s if they served him faithfully, but he didn’t tell them that their life would be perfect. They would still have to work the ground, raise their flocks, go to synagogue, offer their sacrifices, marry, have children and complete the same cycle over and over again each day.

He does, however, promise us that our eternal life will be much sweeter, when Jesus comes back to rule the earth. He expects us to continually love him, serve him, honor him, and seek to live as he has commanded us. Today I am thankful he has taught me to do the soul searching for it shows me the areas in my life I need to work on and it gives me a chance to repent of the sins I have committed, whether they are in thought or deed.

Jesus with children 2October 21, 2016 – The Will to Go On

I can think of many times, before I was a Christian, that I longed to be rid of the life I was living. There were even a few times that I had thought about suicide, but wouldn’t, couldn’t do it. I had a son to take care of and even though at the time I wasn’t serving the Lord, I had been taught that suicide was an unforgivable sin.

A friend of mine from one of the churches the other day, posted a remark on a prayer request for my sister. He said I was an inspiration to him, because, he says “you’ve been to hell and back and never lose your faith in God”. Yes, there have been a lot of circumstances in my life that could equate to hell here on earth and there has been a lot of loss to go with them. If I, in any way inspire someone in the name of Jesus, then I am glad to know that he still has a plan for me.

But one thing I know now, that no matter what the loss, no matter what the event or circumstance, Jesus is standing with me, strengthening me, watching over me and guiding me. I’ve had to many prayers answered and have seen too many miracles to ever lose my faith in god. Too many times I have experienced his protection including many times that I know for a fact, that it was him who saved my life.

Many people choose to just give up when the going gets tough. They don’t know what to do to make their circumstances better, they don’t know how to handle the grief of losing someone they love and they lose the will to go on. Even some Christians have gotten to this point, it is not only those who do not believe. Today I am thankful that he has always given me the will to go on.

older woman prayingOctober 22, 2016 – Reading the Word

Each morning I get up and read a chapter in the old testament and one in the New. I have read several versions of the bible, and truthfully I haven’t found any major differences in them. Right now I am reading the Prophecy Bible by John Hagee and I must admit that I really like the fact that he goes into detail in his interpretations of certain passages.

I often wonder about the way they were taught in the early days, before the bible was written. How they would gather, the men that is, have the scriptures and word taught to them, and then would take it home and teach it to the wife and children. You have to wonder, if at some time, someone along the line might have changed some things? Maybe that is explanation of why there were so many different versions written before the King James was put together.

No matter how many times I read the bible, I find passages, verses and understanding that I missed the first time around. I always find something new and interesting. I think about all the third world nations, some who have pockets of people in the mountains, or out in the low lying country that haven’t even heard the word of God yet . Today I am thankful to be reading the word.

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